Sim cards and dating

June 12 - Thursday

People here are not very religious. Officially, Kyrgyzstan is a Muslim country, but so far it doesn't seem like many people go to Mosque or talk about their beliefs or anything (at least not to me). As far as I can tell, a majority of the people here lead a basically secular life, but with a few traditions thrown in here and there. For example, when you are finished eating but before you get up from the table, you make a gesture with your hands like you're washing your face, then bring them down into a prayre shape and say "Omin", which is similar in meaning to "Amen". Other than that sort of thing, I haven't seen a whole lot of religious activity.

A very famous Kyrgyz writer died this week. His name is Chingiz Aitmatov, and apparently his books are known all around the world. I can't believe I'd never heard of him before. Some of his titles (translated into English) are White Ship, Jimila, Mother's Field and Plaha (among many others). But anyways, this guy was very well loved by the Kyrgyz people, because not only was he a famous writer, but he was also involved in the government and social organizations. He did a lot to improve the city, and now that he's gone, everybody mourns together. On the news I saw the traditional mourning ceremony, which takes place out in the country inside a Yurta, or circular hut thing that is lined and decorated with traditional Kyrgyz carpets. When a person dies, they are taken to a Yurta, where their family may visit them and say goodbye. Then after three days the person is moved and a funeral ceremony is held, after which he is buried.

Aitmatov's funeral took place in the center of the city, at the Philharmonia. So I had a front-row view of it right out my window. The music they play on the street is very interesting and sad, it sounds like a cross between singing and crying, accompanied by a traditional Kyrgyz stringed instrument which I can't remember the name for. Although I'm sad for this country's loss, I also feel lucky to have been able to witness such a tradition; perhaps I will also get to see a Kyrgyz wedding before I go home.


June 14 - Sunday

I bought a cell phone today. I guess the time has finally come when I'm popular enough to need one. Before, only Begaiym and Kanybek ever had any reason to call me, and they both knew my home number. If I wasn't at home, they each knew that I must have been with the other one, and they had one another's cell phone numbers as well. Over the last two weeks though, a handful of other people have asked for my number, but I never got any calls. Turns out that people have been trying to get in touch with me, but I just haven't been getting the messages, coz my host family has no answering machine, and my host sisters keep forgetting to pass along my messages.

Anyways, I'm tired of missed connections, and I'm tired of having to sit at home and wait when I'm expecting a call. So now I have a little Nokia friend :). The phone, sim card, charger and a hundred minutes all cost me 1600 Soms (about $40). I realize now that I could have just brought the phone I already had, and then bought a new sim card from a local service provider in Bishkek for only 150 Soms, but I didn't really understand any of this stuff before I left. I just went with the advice of a more experienced friend: "When I go to Japan every summer, I usually just buy a phone while I'm there and sell it before I leave." I suppose that when I leave Bishkek, I'll take the phone with me and keep it as a back-up for when my current cell phone breaks. Done deal.

But yeah. Today's post is not about cell phones. It's about NEEDING a cell phone. Last weekend I went out with AIESEC kids, but other than Saturday night I sort of just bummed around the house all weekend. This weekend I got invited to so many things that I actually had to turn 3 or 4 people down. Marat invited me to his wife's Birthday party, and he also invited me to his nephew's circumcision (which is apparently a traditional Kyrgyz ceremony that all boys go through when they start walking). Williams and one other dude whose name escapes me at the moment, who are both talking club teachers like me, each asked if I wanted to do something Sunday, and Jeff offered to show me around the city. On top of that, this Sunday should have been opening conference for AIESEC's "Save the Future" project. So I had to write a speech and meet with an interperiter who could translate for me during the event.

I'm sure you can imagine then, my disappiontment when one by one, each of my plans either fell through or were postponed. And worse still, I didn't have any way to contact the people who I'd turned down because of my "busy schedule". I don't really know what to think. Either I'm repeatedly misunderstanding everybody when they try to make plans with me, or the Kyrgyz people are just flighty. Oh well. At least now I have a phone, so either way I'm sure communication problems will be less frequent in the future.


June 16 - Monday

One thing I really like about this culture is the fact that people wear the same clothes over and over again. At home if you wear the same otufit two days in a row, people will tend to assume that you are either poor or in the middle of doing laundry, and you have nothing else to wear. But that's not at all the case in Kyrgyzstan.

In this culture it is perfectly acceptable to wear the same outift, or variations on the same outfit, for several days in a row. Even for really nice, dressy clothes, you just keep wearing them, or alternate with other clothes, until they are dirty. I really like this. As someone who is not hugely interested in fashion or mixing and matching, I find that this is a huge relief, especially considering the limited amount of clothes and accessories I brought with me on this trip.

I've also noticed that social scripts for when it's apropriate to wear certain types of clothes to this or that occasion are completely different than what you see in the United States. There are people here who dress like they are going out to the night club, even if they're only walking down the street to buy groceries. Yet other people will wear much more casual stuff to what I normally would have assumed is a formal environment, like at work for example. Many people wear boring, unattractive clothes, while others mix pieces that I myself would never think to wear together. Like track pants and heels, for example.

And get this: I've seen more pairs of bright yellow heels i this city than I have ever seen in my life. I can't decide if it's because yellow shoes are stylish right now, or if they are simply more popular here. I don't understand fashion rules in this country, if there are any. Which is a huge load of my mind, because it effectively gives me the freedom to wear whatever the heck I want, when I want, and for as long as I like (or don't like). It's nice. People never seem to comment on each other's clothes at all. They don't even compliment one another if somebody is wearing especially fancy clothes, because some people dress like that all the time. You don't stand out much when you're especially dressy.


April 19 - Thursday

How do you know for sure when a date is a date? There are a few tell-tale signs, right? The other person dresses up, or they keep popping mints or gum. Or perhaps they offer to buy your meal, or open doors. Or maybe you go on a walk afterwards, just talking, and at the end the guy will walk you do your door instead of dropping you off with a casual, "See you later." But what about in other countries? What if the person you're having dinner with would pay for your meal even if the two of you were the same sex? What if walking is a common social activity, and opening doors is customary?

People here have all been very nice to me. Usually when I meet somebody that I'm likely to see again, whether it's somebody from AIESEC or work, or a friend of a friend, they very often offer to take me out and show me around. But lately I'm noticing that I get a lot more invitations like these from guys than from girls. I can't figure out if they are just being hospitable, or if they are asking me out on a date. At home if a guy asks me for my number, I can safely assume that he intends to ask me out. But here I'm not so sure.

The reason I bring this up is because a few nights ago I had a really good time at a cafe with somebody I know from work. He picked me up, we went and had a couple drinks, we laughed, we talked, he paid for me and then we went for a really long walk. I got home at 2 in the morning, and I woke up the next day with a big grin on my face. Was this a date? Hah, I really have no idea. He didn't try to make any moves on me, but that could mean anything. Maybe he was just a gengleman. Maybe people don't kiss on the first date around here. Maybe the evening was just a friendly get-together, and nothing romantic at all. It just makes me reflect on the whole ritual of courtship, and I can't help but laugh at all the silly little signs people look for, rather than just being open and honest about their feelings. The little signs make it easy to avoid being direct, but all the rules change when you're courting across culture barriers. I suppose either way I'll find out soon enough, but all the same. It's an interesting puzzle.


Tune in later amigos :)